ASSIGNMENT #2 - Finding Your Howl

Please visit http://changethis.com/ to read Jonathan Flaum's FIND YOUR HOWL.

Find Your Howl

This is a story of endangered wolves that are reintroduced to the wild after conservation efforts by humans. However, they have forgotten how to howl. One wolf is ready to take on nature and learns of his hunting instincts. He feels guilty at first, but then learns that it is what he needs to do to survive. When he learns this, he sacrifices himself and, in a spiritual way, teaches all of the other wolves how to howl.  The meaning behind this story is that we must go through hardships and internal conflicts to achieve what we want.

This guy found his howl.

Tool - "Reflection"

I have come curiously close to the end, down

Beneath my self-indulgent pitiful hole,

Defeated, I concede and

Move closer

I may find comfort here

I may find peace within the emptiness

How pitiful

It's calling me...

And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping

The moon tells me a secret - my confidant

As full and bright as I am

This light is not my own and

A million light reflections pass over me

Its source is bright and endless

She resuscitates the hopeless

Without her, we are lifeless satellites drifting

And as I pull my head out I am without one doubt

Don't wanna be down here feeding my narcissism.

I must crucify the ego before it's far too late

I pray the light lifts me out

Before I pine away.

So crucify the ego, before it's far too late

To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical,

And you will come to find that we are all one mind

Capable of all that's imagined and all conceivable.

Just let the light touch you

And let the words spill through

And let them pass right through

Bringing out our hope and reason ...

before we pine away.

The song “Reflection” really speaks to me creatively. As a drummer, what originally caught my attention were the innovative drum parts. The use of mainly tribal rhythms was something that I’ve never heard before in rock music, and I have since found ways to incorporate these types of rhythms in my own playing. However, upon further listening to this song, the lyrics started to jump out at me more and more. Tool’s lyrics are often written about and debated over. Since there is no confirmed meaning to any of the songs, they can be interpreted in any way the listener feels fit. To me, “Reflection” gives me inspiration and guidance on how to stay creative and inspired as an artist.

When stuck in an artistic rut, it can be hard to know where to go. It feels as if nothing is progressing and it is becoming increasingly more difficult to come up with fresh ideas. Many times, ones own endeavors can become to challenging and difficult that the only way out seems to be to simply give up. It can be interpreted that the lyrics refer to this as a “self-indulgent pitiful hole”. And, in wake of this artistic block, one can easily start to believe that there is no need to keep going, and that the current level of ability and creativity is “good enough” (“Defeated... I may find peace within the emptiness/How pitiful”).

This sometimes happens to me when I am stuck practicing a technique or “chop” for hours on end. While practicing, I start to think, “if I just get this technique down I will be able to impress so many people” or “this chop will make the other drummers’ jaws drop!” This, of course, is the wrong way to go about it and only feeds the ego. In the end, when I’m so systematic about practice and so keen on impressing others, creativity is abandoned and I don’t even know how to include the things I learn into my playing. However, I am always able to catch myself when I'm headed in this direction ("Don't wanna be down here feeding my narcissism/I must crucify the ego before it's far too late")

Sometimes all that is needed is a helping hand or a replenishing reality-check. Sometimes a small push in the right direction can lead to a rush of new ideas. The analogy in “Reflection” that refers to this is the moon. The speaker listens to the moon for hope during his darkest time, and is rushed with inspiration and joy when “she” responds (“A million light reflections pass over me/Its source is bright and endless/She resuscitates the hopeless”).

For me, my moon comes to me in the form of inspiring drummers. The one that comes to mind immediately is my drum teacher, Matt Schoneman. He always knows how to keep me on my toes and keep my creative mind flourishing. Although his main goal is to guide me and to help further my capabilities as a drummer, he also knows how to make sure I don’t let my ego get the best of me. He does this by throwing challenges at me along the way. Other drummers also inspire me to utilize different styles, techniques, and flavors into my playing. Whenever I see a drummer who is better than me at a certain aspect of playing, I am never envious and I am always encouraged. As mentioned earlier, the drum parts played by Danny Carey in this very song prompted me to imitate and, eventually, manipulate this style to be included in my own playing.

In conclusion, I see the song “Reflection” as an inspiration song that guides me during my struggles to become a better musician. I sometimes get so wound up in technical exercises and rudimentary rituals that the left side of the brain takes over and the right side gets left behind. While practice is key to success, the idea of success can sometimes leave one’s creativity drained. This is a bit of a catch-22, as (for the most part), success in music cannot be achieved without creativity. Therefore, one must “crucify the ego” to be able to achieve “all that’s imagined and all conceivable”.

The final minutes of "Reflection" performed by Danny Carey